You’re not meant to do any of this alone. Although, it can feel that way. When the times are down, or you’re a bit unsure, or you’re feeling some things that you really wish that you weren’t feeling…sometimes the easiest thing to do is clam up. Admit it to no one. And put all of the pressure on figuring out what to do about it.
You actually do need support. Not from everyone. And not at all times. But when you’re working on pushing the train out of the station, it’s helpful to not have to do that alone and rely on the energy that’s around you. There IS so much around, if you take the time to look for it, to build it, to deepen it, and to call on it. And by it…I mean them. Your support system.
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It’s OK if you don’t feel like you have one. It’s OK if your system is small. It’s OK you’re still testing the waters with those people. But like any good system, you’re going to work together with what you do have. Or work to set it up so you can get there. If you already have a killer one, great. Don’t take it for granted and rather make the most of what’s supporting you.
No matter where you’re at, don’t miss on these right now. Because the journey is far more beautiful when it’s accented with the people who get us. And who want the best for us.
First, assess who who your cheerleaders are. In the constellation that is your support system, the brightest light are the people always cheering you on. I talk about cheerleaders a lot. Because when you’re up, or when you’re way down, these people have so got you. Recently though, I was pulled aside by a young woman who asked, “But if you have no idea who these people are…how do you look for them?” To which I responded with something along the lines of this.
Second, figure out your roster. Taking time to know who does what in your support system is going to help you. It’ll ensure you know who to go to for what. It doesn’t mean you need a million different types of people, it just might mean you need a few people who can provide you with lots of different things. Here’s some starters to consider.
Lastly, support them. What comes around goes around. So make sure to give your love, give your enthusiasm, and be generous with your encouragement for all the people who are so generous with theirs. It’ll bring the system closer together.
You’re not alone. And in the days you feel like you are, remember to start here. Everyone’s support system started somewhere.
This article originally appeared on Maxie McCoy.
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