Photo: thecrazyfilmgirl via Flickr
I know. Never is a long time. But some lessons are learned so as not to be repeated. Some moments are lived so as not to ever have to cycle through them again. Barring all momentary lapse of memories, intuition, or good judgment, I’ll never repeat these again:
I’ll never … Assume they’re fine. Our women are strong. But not so strong that they don’t need our love and support. We gotta show up, even when they’ve got a bold face of courage painted on their heart of sorrow.
I’ll never … Try to fit the mold. The only mold worth fitting is the one you’re breaking out of. Because learning that you’re not meant for a mold of any kind, that you’re meant to change and grow and evolve, opens you up to be as brilliantly and energetically you as possible.
I’ll never … Run a marathon. Do I even need to explain why I’ll never do this again? You runners, I applaud you.
I’ll never … Wear a full-zip dress with nothing under it. Listen, sometimes zippers fail. And other times, they fail at impossibly tragic times. And even worse, sometimes you end up at a glitzy party with a dress hanging like a hospital gown around your neck. Bare ass. With your bestie hugging you from behind so no one “sees” you.
I’ll never … Let truth go unsaid. Speaking your truth, especially when the truth is hard and the speaking is hard, is well, hard. Eventually is your best friend here. Make sure your truth gets said eventually, even if you can’t do it right now.
I’ll never … Stay in controlling relationships (of any kind). The relationship doesn’t have to be romance for it to be wildly controlling. If someone is squashing the fire that makes you you … and loses their shit as soon as you step out of the thoughts, expectations, or container that they’ve deemed for you. Check it. See how and where your emotions and actions might be controlled. And then talk to someone who can help you navigate it. Surround yourself with people who want you to be the most of you, not the least of it.
I’ll never … Choose text over voice (when it matters). Pick up the damn phone. If you gotta fret over “how this comes across,” buck up and face it either on the phone or face-to-face.
I’ll never … Forget my power. We have the force of a thousand galaxies within us. And we mustn’t forget that.
But I know, never is a long time. If we’re being real, I’ll probably forget my “no full-zip” rule when the dress is pretty enough. I might squash my own truth in the pursuit of someone or something else. I might assume they’re fine. I might send an email instead. I might get caught up in the molds. But I’ll come back to myself, and so will you, because never is a really long time. Let’s just repeat whatever doesn’t serve us as little as we can.