It doesn’t matter how many courses you take. Or how many books you read. Or how many blogs you follow. Nothing will push you to greatness more than the right people in your life. Full stop. Mic drop. Your relationships are your everything.
When I look back on the massive, oh so crazy, stars aligned kind of moments that took my life in a completely different direction than I planned … it all came down to the people involved.
People are everything. Relationships push and grow and support us. The people who believe in us. The people who know more than us. The ones who teach us. The ones who love us. The ones who make us laugh. Make us healthy. Validate. Challenge.
There will be a lot of people on your path to greatness. The right people will come from getting clear on who you need around you. Who you have. Where you need to build. How you need to connect.
These are the 15 people that have hands down changed everything for me. Fill your treasure chest with these humans and you’ll have a life you never believed possible:
Somebody who knows you. Who knows what you want to do. And can beautifully pull out the answers you already have inside of you. They help you see what you know. And strategize for what you feel like you don’t. For me, this comes in the form of a biz coach. For you, it might be someone who helps you game plan your buy-a-house goal. Or an advisor who gives you seasoned advice for how to move forward.
Jim, Jim, and more Jim. Most of you know all about him at this point. A healer never would have been on my list even 18 months ago. But we all have hurt. We all have pain. And it doesn’t have to be up to only you to heal that. Whether it’s a metaphysical masseuse in Bali, an astrologist in Denver, a Tarot card reader in NYC, or a psychologist in San Francisco, find someone who has a special skill to help you see your own strength in order to heal your own pain.
The Triumphant Contemporary
I’ve been graced with too many of these to count. The bestie who’s killing it. Your most successful friend. The peer who shows you the ropes. Bring into your circle a suite of friends who want to see you crush it. Who believe in your talents. Who are more excited about your success than you are. Who can introduce you. Connect you. Share you. They’re rooted in their own success so they have no problem contributing to yours.
Mentors have landed me every major break I’ve ever had. From writing gigs, to TV spots, to team tryouts, to promotions, to an agent. They get where you’re going. They leverage. They call you on your missteps. And they’re as willing to give as they are to learn, thus allowing a beautiful two-way street for information, love, help, and genius.
Because of a coach, I had the courage to go to Bali. Because of a coach, I’ve been able to hire people onto my team. Because of a coach, I’ve made it through truly tough moments. Coaches are tough love. They’re open with feedback. They push as much as they encourage. They’re a necessity on any path. With any craft. You don’t get better without an invested third party perspective. They’re worth every dollar, and your bucks are important for the skin you’ll have in the game.
Might be your bestie. Might be your brother. Might be your lover. Might be your pup. Whoever fills you to the brim with positive, light, and oh so inspired energy. The one you leave skipping, truly skipping, after being in their presence. Your energizer might be one person. It might be lots of people. It might be your whole treasure chest. Pay attention and keep close those who fill you. And be one back.
Who do you feel comfortable with when running at 10 percent? Let down your walls. Bring down the guards. Not have to impress. Not have to “act.” And just be. Be sad. Be weird. Be moody. Be down. Not all the time, but when you need it. Who lets you recharge when the rest of the world wants your energy? Family fits here often. So too do partners and besties. Just make sure that they’re not always getting your totally drained battery. They deserve your best, too.
Long talks about shit that doesn’t matter. Even longer talks about everything that does. Hot tea until it’s cold on the couch. Coffee dates bundled up in the car in front of a park that last 3 hours longer than they were supposed to. Wine nights that left you with a massive hangover and a happy heart. The ones you can lose yourself in. Who know you better than you know yourself. The ones that personify love.
The believer in everything you are. Everything you’ve done. Everything you can do. Believer in who you’ve been. How you’ve done it. Your core. Your essence. The ones who don’t flinch for a second when you stumble or fall. Who don’t blink when you screw up. Who don’t pull back when you succeed. They believe in humanity and they believe in you. And your reason for greatness.
That quick strike of energy that gets everything moving. Ideas flowing. Action happening. A series of events into full momentum. They’re great beginners. They know just what to say. They’re the ideas people.
Everybody needs epic love. Some months you might be your best lover. Some weeks the strongest love might be that of your family. Others your friends. And often your partner. Your kid. Love on love on love, it’s all we really need and all that really matters. They’ll erase pain. Void worries. And return you to yourself when you need it most.
Sibling or not, this woman knows you. Believes in you. She’s the one who you can pick up with weeks later. The one who calls you on your shit. The one who loves you regardless of who you are or what you’re doing now. She’ll answer the phone in the middle of the night. She’ll make you laugh in the face of tears. She’ll key that asshole’s car. She’ll look at pictures of the rash on your butt and attempt to diagnose from 8,000 miles away. And she’ll always share her wine.
They just get things going. They might be an assistant. Or a friend with a mean spreadsheet template. Or someone always getting you away from your computer and out to dinner thanks to a calendar invite. A workout buddy. They give you structure where you need it. Keep you committed. And help you progress.
The one who knows none of this really matters. That we’re a part of something so much bigger. That we create our own reality. That there’s more to this life. Who brings you out of the bullshit and the day-to-day to dream big, see bigger, and understand our interconnectedness goes far beyond this life. Or these relationships. Or connections. The only connection that matters is one made of stars. Of source. Whatever you call that. #universe
Grounded. Home. Centered. They’re the person who keeps you there. When life gets crazy. When troubles go awry. They bring you back and remind you none of this is really that bad. That you will indeed make it through another day.
How’s your treasure chest of humans looking? [This 5-step guide to meaningful connections should help!]
Some vacancies? Say a little prayer. Open up with the problems or people you’re missing and you’ll begin to attract them. Keep your eyes up and your heart open.
Full and brimming? Tell them what they mean to you. Thank them. Love them. Hug them. Pass this one along.
And any chance you get, be the love to others that you’re getting in return. We all play many of these roles to various people. You might be the cuppa to one and the triumphant contemporary to another and the mentor to the next. Give with your heart. Share your energy. It’s a giant thank you for the people who have pulled you up onto the path to greatness.
Maxie McCoy is a writer and speaker obsessed with giving women the tools they need to believe in themselves. Committed to the global rise of women, she writes weekly inspiration on maxiemccoy.com, and specializes in creating offline experiences for top brands. Her work has been featured on Good Morning America, Bustle, Fortune, INC, Women’s Health, and more. Her forthcoming book You’re Not Lost: An Inspired Action Plan for Finding Your Own Way will be published by TarcherPerigee of Penguin Random House.